Saturday, May 28, 2011

The Day I Lost My Voice

This past week I caught a cold.  One of my symptoms was that I lost my voice.  Imagine my disability - trying to lead six kids and a husband through homework, dinner hour and bedtime without a voice.  I am the facilitator and I lost one of my tools.  Normally, I try to have  everything in order, so we can have a peaceful atmosphere with life's necessities getting done and still connect with each other.  This is my goal not always the actual situation.  Sometimes to get my family's attention to remind them to use quieter voices or to start a dialogue with any one of them, I admit that I raise my voice level.  It gets the job done, but I do not always like the process.

When I lost my voice, I could not resort to the loud voice technique.  I had to whisper everything I said, but everyone paid more attention when I spoke.  Plus, the kids and my husband were using quiet voices in all their interactions.  When one of my kids wanted to talk with me, I found myself listening and connecting better.  I was not able to multitask and talk or bottom line them in the conversation.  I had to look directly at them, use my face and eyes to show attention and finally whisper out a response.  The kids actually revealed more about themselves and their day.

In essence losing my voice made me quieter, a better communicator and more peaceful.  When I became that, my goal of creating a peaceful home atmosphere with quality interactions was realized.  By changing me, I changed the situation.  So many times we try to change our externals instead of changing the one thing we can change which is ourselves.  I will try to  remember this lesson when I do use my new found voice.

Stay healthy & well,

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