Sunday, June 15, 2014

My Top Ten Random Thoughts While Preparing for My Son's Wedding

This is my way of venting and telling everyone my blog may be out of commission for a couple weeks while I prepare for this joyous milestone.  In Ayurveda when we meditate we allow our monkey mind to do its thing jumping from one random thought to another.  It is a way to clear the mind, calm the stress response, process experience and get rest.  The mantra is the vehicle that allows these things to happen.  Usually, thoughts seem random but they tend to be connected to the prior thought.  For example, I need apples at the market.  Then, I think what will I make for dinner.  My sister Dena is a great cook and she told me about a pasta recipe.  Then, I think how Dena and I love the summer.  Next, I calculate if I finish my work really fast, maybe I can spend some time outside.  All these thoughts appear unconnected, but they aren't.  It is my stream of consciousness.  This free flow describes my top ten wedding preparation thoughts.

  1. The best and funniest advice about being a mother-in-law is "wear beige and keep your mouth shut."
  2. Ever since I became pregnant with my oldest son, I have the ability to cry at anything.  You name it, tissue commercials, school programs with any child (not just mine) speaking or singing, reading the newspaper, hearing about a birth, engagement or wedding, looking at a person drop his drink by mistake, rescues, etc. etc.  This ability to cry has only intensified with my son's engagement.  I am hoping the trend will stop after he gets married.  Maybe even before the wedding so I do not sob uncontrollably in my happiness.
  3. This wedding is out of town and it has not been easy planning.  Getting recommendations from family and friends has helped me so much.  I feel blessed to have people's advice.
  4. Indescribable happiness at watching your child being in a relationship that he is willing to commit to for life.
  5. Gaining even more respect for my parents who have parented my sisters, brother and I through infancy, adolescence, college, jobs, weddings, marriage, grandchildren and more.  I don't think being a parent ever ends.  It only changes in how it's done.  While we may not be perfect, giving love and showing up are the most important things.  This is huge and my parents continue to do it.
  6. Appreciating my husband Gary in every step of child rearing to this point and beyond.  A man and woman are different in so many ways, as are two people in their personality.  Gary and I have this rhythm where we each know what the other can and cannot handle.  We are doing this dance for the wedding, and I feel grateful someone is covering me and I get to cover him.
  7. Being reminded on a daily basis by my adolescent teens and kids who live at home that I do not know what fits in and what will be socially acceptable.
  8. Expanding on that, feeling like I am in high school again and trying to fit in.  This time the in crowd are my future daughter, her parents and the rest of their family.  I may be old enough to have a married kid, but I am still young in my social skills.  I really want to be liked.
  9. Worrying how I will fit in my daily Ayurvedic health routine into my day as the wedding gets closer.  It is my way of keeping balanced.
  10. Knowing this wedding is a huge blessing and wanting to be able to do this for all my children, but wondering if it gets easier.  While some things get easier through routine and repetition, I never want my gratitude and awe for the journey of life to become routine.  Maybe I can balance the two.
May we all be busy with happy occasions and celebrating our relationships.  See you in a couple weeks when I am God willing a mother-in-law.  My blogs may be different as I master how to keep my mouth shut and wear beige.

Stay healthy & well,

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