Sunday, July 6, 2014

How Ayurveda Helped Me Stay Balanced During My Son's Wedding

My last blog focused on my random thoughts before my oldest son's upcoming wedding.  Being a person who likes communication and closure, I wanted to give some tips and musings on how it all went.  The wedding itself was beautiful.  When people go out of their way to attend and take part in the celebration, it is very touching.  Even if someone is a relative or close friend, I never take it for granted that they had to be there anyway.  The appreciation and gratitude is always fresh.

A wedding is a big production with many details.  It is also something that is not done routinely.  Additionally, it is an emotionally charged event.  Therefore, many things have the potential to go wrong.  To avoid overwhelm and disappointment, three things kept me sane.  One, I made sure to exercise everyday no matter what.  Exercise is a sanctuary and very meditative for me, so it kept me grounded.  Ayurveda recommends a daily routine to maintain balance in daily life because there  are many things pulling at us.  The exercise also released stress, helped me sleep better and helped me feel on track with my weight despite the indulgent foods eaten during celebrations and traveling.  Two, I added Ayurvedic herbal support for stress.  Ashwagandha and Tulsi are the best herbs for stress and strengthening.  They work on a physical level to modulate cortisol (the stress hormone) and they bolster immunity.  They kept my body in very good shape and provided energy.  Three, I set an intent.  I wanted to enjoy this unbelievably joyous occasion.  Any one who has ever participated in a wedding knows things will go wrong or things will not go according to plan.  In the face of many trying issues, I asked myself, "was it worth getting upset and risk not enjoying this time with my family?"  The answer was always no.  Ayurveda (as does my religion) recommends setting an intent and mindfulness as you go throughout your day.  Living a life with intent and purpose, empowers you to rise to the occasion instead of being a victim.  We cannot control events, but we can control how we deal with them.  Sometimes life gets hectic and I forget this, but the wedding was a short term event that I was able to remain focused on this principle.  I would like to carry it over into my life more.

I still have two unanswerable questions though.  Maybe I can solve them another time.  First, how can my heart hold such joy and a certain feeling of loss at the same time?  Every parent wants their child to be happy and make an independent life for themselves.  Yet, when they succeed, there is a sense of loss for the little child that you loved and raised.  From the day a child is born, the feelings of love a parent has is boundless.  I wanted to give my children everything they needed to live a fulfilling life.  With gratitude, this milestone has been an accomplishment, but there is a sense of bittersweet.  It would be nice to focus on the positive and reconcile the contradiction.  My second question is why do wedding gowns that cost so much money get destroyed during the dancing and throughout the evening?  I have older clothes that cost 10 to 20 times less than the wedding gown and have put up with a lot more wear and tear, but are still wearable.  Shouldn't wedding gowns come with a warranty?  Maybe next time, I will wear a suit like a man.  It is cheaper and easier.  May we always share joyous occasions!

Stay healthy & well,

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